2020 threw us a curve ball. I remember journaling just before new years eve, writing down the goals I wanted to reach by the end of the year and crowning this year as the grandest of them all. Safe to say it did not pan out the way most of us planned. Instead I believe it shoved us into places we never thought we would end up.
One of my goals were the big B! Living a balanced life. Reach my goal weight by eating healthy, exercise at least 5 times per week and get 8 hours of sleep at night. As we all know, lockdown created the opposite rhythm and introduced – no exercise because I couldn’t leave the house, eating whatever I could find and watching series and movies until my days became nights and vice versa. Failed much!
And then it starts. The regret of wasted time. The mights and maybes of our decisions that keeps us awake at night. What if I ate better, started a online business, what if I never held on to that relationship or never resigned. What if I spent more time with…, read more, prayed more, what if, what if I…. and what would have happened if I……!
Consider just for one moment, we stop spending our emotional energy and thought ‘bandwidth’ on regretting what we did not do with the past six months of 2020 and lets decide, discern and discuss what is the NEXT RIGHT THING to do. Why don’t we just fix our eyes on what can be instead of regretting what should have been. Let’s fix our eyes on what is in front and not behind.
A.W Tozer says: Most of us go through life praying a little, planning a little, jockeying for position, hoping but never being quite certain of anything, and always secretly afraid that we will miss the way. E. Freeman writes: It does not matter what the decision is, unmade decisions hold power. They pull, push, they interrupt where they aren’t wanted and poke us awake at night. They can turn us into strange versions of ourselves.
Why do we struggle to make changes or decisions? Because we fear failure and because we want certainty that it will work out perfectly and we want clarity of HOW it will pan out. Some of us value the approval of others and in seeking their perspective this creates a chronic case of hesitation. We have failed ourselves so many times we back out of decision to protect ourselves. Some of us don’t want to make decisions because we want to avoid criticism from ourselves and others.
So what can we do now:
1. Think of one thing you regret not doing in the past 6 months.
2. Decide the ONE right thing you can and should do now. What is possible?
3. What adjustments can you make in your everyday thought-life and actions that will serve this ONE NEW RIGHT THING?
4. Give the decision the time it deserves.
5. Decide what ‘work’ needs to be done: Research, interviewing, training, coaching.
6. Turn down the screams of the crowd and your own critical voice.
7. Believe it is possible and remind yourself you are worth it!
8. Silence the voice of regret, do the one next right thing.